Seeds of Strength: What Suffering Can Teach Us
Suffering isn’t noble, but it can shape us into more empathetic, clear-eyed, and resilient people.
Apr 13, 2025
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It’s one of life’s great contradictions: The world is breathtakingly beautiful — and deeply painful — all at the same time.
I’ve noticed that this contrast seems to stand out most in spring, when nature celebrates amid blossoming flowers and budding trees. Yet still, many of us are carrying burdens through no fault of our own. Loss, illness, loneliness, or worry don’t vanish just because the season changes.
Spring teaches us that renewal is possible even after the harshest winters, that joy can return slowly but surely. But the questions remain: What do we do with our pain? How do we make sense of suffering? Why do bad things happen to good people?
These are questions that philosophers, spiritual leaders, and everyday people have wrestled with for centuries. We know that the presence of pain doesn’t cancel out the joy of life. Somehow, in holding both, we grow.
Making sense of suffering
Across cultures throughout centuries, people have turned to religion for guidance. Nearly every faith grapples with suffering to help us live with it, learn from it, and perhaps most importantly, grow through it. Their frameworks help many of us move forward with greater courage and hope.
In Buddhism, suffering (or dukkha) is the first noble truth: an unavoidable part of existence, but not a permanent one. Through mindfulness, one can rise above it. In Hinduism, suffering is seen as part of a vast karmic cycle, shaped by past actions and stretched across lifetimes. In Islam, suffering is understood as a test of faith and character. It’s a chance to exercise patience (sabr), draw closer to God, and extend compassion to others.
In Judaism, suffering is deeply acknowledged. The Book of Job gives voice to anguish and unanswered questions, reflecting the human cry for meaning in hardship. Jewish tradition emphasizes perseverance, justice, and the strength of community in times of trial. Through remembrance, lament, and the work of repair (tikkun olam), Judaism finds purpose even in pain.
And for Christians, there’s this week — Holy Week. From the triumphal entry of Palm Sunday to the anguish of Gethsemane, the story of Jesus’ final days is one of profound human suffering. But it doesn’t end there. Easter Sunday brings resurrection, renewal, and the enduring hope that suffering and death do not have the final say.
Understanding the purpose of pain
All the great religious traditions share an arc that everyone can recognize. Life hands us moments of loss, heartbreak, and hardship. But often, just when we least expect it, healing begins and light returns.
Suffering is not the end of the story but the middle. It’s the darkness before dawn and the winter before spring. And, most importantly, suffering is a doorway, not a dead end.
In a recent article in Psychology Today, my colleague, Meredith Weinberg, teamed up with my friend, psychologist Dr. George S. Everly, Jr., to explore how suffering can serve as a catalyst for personal growth.
Meredith and George suggest that while we may not control external events, we can manage our internal responses, transforming suffering into an opportunity for development. This concept, known as post-traumatic growth, is supported by research indicating that individuals who navigate significant challenges often emerge with a deeper appreciation for life, enhanced personal strength, and improved relationships.
In other words, the experience of suffering changes us. We become more patient and more empathetic. And we connect more deeply with others because we’ve walked the same valleys. We don’t look away from others’ pain. Instead, we reach out because we’ve felt it, too. There’s an unexpected solidarity in suffering.
The resilience gained by suffering
Resiliency is another outcome of suffering. How many people do you know, perhaps even yourself, who emerged from hardship with a new sense of clarity? Who, after grief, rediscovered joy? Who, after heartbreak, found purpose?
Suffering strips away the trivial and reveals the essential. It turns down the noise of the world and helps us hear the small, honest voice inside ourselves. We begin to understand what we can endure, what we cannot live without, and who we want to be.
None of this is to romanticize pain. Suffering is hard, and it hurts. But if we must pass through it, and many of us do come through it, then let us also honor what it can teach us and the gifts it may leave behind, like empathy, clarity, resilience, and a gentler heart.
All the best,
Jim
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AUTHOR
Jim McCann is the founder, CEO, and chairman of 1-800-FLOWERS.COM, Inc. as well as a business leader, author, and philanthropist with a passion for helping people deliver smiles. Devoted to helping others, he also founded Smile Farms, a 501(c)3 organization that provides meaningful jobs in agricultural settings to young adults and adults with developmental disabilities.
