Jordan Toma — motivational speaker, author, and online influencer — is a true inspiration. As an advocate for kids, teens, and young adults, Toma encourages young people struggling with learning disabilities (and/or low self-confidence and diminished self-esteem) not to give up hope on their futures, even if things feel bleak in the present.
He knows firsthand what it’s like to grow up with those challenges, and he might have given up on himself were it not for the strength and tenacity of his mom, Debbie, whose belief in her son remained steadfast throughout his life.
Jordan realized as early as the second grade that he didn’t process information as quickly as his peers. That led to him receiving special attention in school, which, in turn, caused him to feel different. “I was getting extra help and leaving the classroom for a smaller class,” Toma says. “I was frustrated because I didn’t understand why (all this was happening).”
As the years passed, Jordan continued to struggle. He skipped school all the time, and when he did go, he barely tried. “I pretty much did everything I could not to be in the classroom,” he says. “You feel out of place and like everybody knows you’re not as smart — and that’s how you start to see yourself.”
But Debbie knew her son had potential, and she refused to let him quit.
“I tried my best to keep him on track,” Debbie says. “I let him know that it was OK to be frustrated, but I knew that if I gave up, he’d give up. So, I had to keep pushing and doing whatever it took.”
Debbie worked a lot “behind the scenes,” she says, to ensure her son had access to every possible resource. She met with teachers, counselors, and school administrators, hired tutors, and even took Jordan to a neuropsychologist. “There wasn’t a stone that I was not going to turn over,” she says.
Keeping the faith
Over the years, Debbie met with professional educators who told her that Jordan wasn’t college material and that she was wasting her time pushing him in that direction. She refused to believe it. “I had enough belief in myself and Jordan to know that he was going to make it,” she says. “I knew that Jordan had something special, even though he didn’t know it.”
After barely graduating high school, Jordan applied to more than a dozen colleges. He was rejected by all but one: Centenary University in Hackettstown, New Jersey, which accepted him into its Step Ahead program as a requirement of admission. That meant he’d have to enroll in classes over the summer.
Jordan was incensed.
“I had just spent my whole life trying to get out of school,” he says. “I lost my mind; I wanted to run away from home.”
A mother’s (tough) love
Debbie was having none of it and forced Jordan to attend the program. “[My husband, John, and I] told Jordan that he could change his life.” She and John dropped their son off at school, but as they drove away, Jordan broke down in tears. “I felt like they had set me up for failure,” he says.
Then, something happened. While looking at himself in the mirror, Jordan had a moment of clarity. “Whenever I got to a spot in my life where it was hard, I just quit,” he says. “I hated that feeling, and I just wondered, ‘What if my mom is right? What if I just really commit for once in my life?’”
From that moment on, everything in Jordan’s life changed. He began waking up early, sitting at the front of the class, studying late every night in the library. He worked with tutors and saw a social worker to talk about his anxiety. When he received his first A on an English paper, his confidence soared. Jordan graduated from the program with a 4.0 GPA and went on to earn a psychology degree.
Since then, Jordan achieved success in several different areas — he runs an insurance business, works as a financial adviser, and owns real estate — but his real passion is inspiring and motivating kids who face the same challenges he did. He produces uplifting online videos for kids and their parents, and he tours schools around the country telling his story. “I tell them that my struggle was my strength,” he says. “I tell kids that even if they don’t look good on paper, that doesn’t tell their full story. It’s not the truth.”
Jordan is eternally grateful to Debbie for never giving up on him. “She saw beyond all my doubt, which helped me show up every day, even though I didn’t want to,” he says. “Whenever I was on the verge of quitting, there was my mom telling me there was no other option than to move forward. It forced me to believe in myself.”
Learn more about Jordan Toma and his mother, Debbie, at JordanToma.com.
AUTHOR
Rebecca Razo has over 20 years of experience in book and magazine publishing, editorial project management, and content creation. She has overseen the creative development of hundreds of books, and she writes across multiple categories, including art, DIY, home decor, lifestyle, and more. Originally from Southern California, Rebecca now lives in the Pacific Northwest where she enjoys hiking, reading, baking, and cuddling with her two dogs and cat.